WINNER!!!!
In what turned out to be a truly anti-climactic turn of events, Sarah shit her pants.
Submitted By: DC STar
RUNNERS-UP:
2. The origin of the term “Fire Crotch”
Submitted By: Nalley
3. One case of pink eye coming up bitch
Submitted By: Blumpkin King
HONORABLE MENTION:
“How to make a flame smell like Roman Polanksi’s dick. ”
Submitted By: Razor Ramon
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Hooooowwwwwwddddyyyyy HO!!
That’s what’s these hos said before shitting their pants. Props to DC Star on his doody-sprinkled win. My guess is he pulled that caption from personal experience — one too many PF Gambles (that’s a Poop-Fart Gamble folks, look it up) lost in his lifetime. Thinking he had to fart, only to realize there was more to it. To be more specific, there was now a warm chocolate squirrel hiding in his pants.
Nice work DC, the man has entered many a great caption and now he’s got the Pizza shirt to prove it.
Also props to Nalley for his nail-bitingly close 2nd place finish. I enjoyed his word play with “fire crotch” — the thought of firey pubes (a la Lindsey Lohan) juxtaposed against the very real fire of these two young ladies. It’s like poetry in motion, watching Monet paint…or some shit like that.
I must also give a tip of the hat to Blumpkin King and Razor Ramon. Both of you left a foul taste in my mouth — it tasted like hilariousness, with a slight hint of methane. I’ll have my people forward this along to Polanski’s people, so that they know that we know that his dick smells like poop, with a bit of pink eye sprinkled in for good measure. Oh, and some Quaaludes.
Lastly, I’ll leave you with this piece of advice: Next time you want to spit hot fire to a girl, take a minute, compose yourself, and focus your attention. Then, shit hot fire instead. They will eat it up like chocolate.
Truer words have never been spoken. New caption contest starting next week, so stay tuned!!
